Lesbian vs Sapphic vs WLW vs Queer vs Bi: What's the Difference?

Lesbian describes women (and some nonbinary people) attracted to women, not men. Sapphic and WLW (women who love women) are broader umbrellas that include lesbians, bi and pan women. Queer is wider still, covering anyone outside straight or cisgender norms. Bi means attraction to more than one gender. People often use more than one.

If you have ever stared at a dating app bio wondering why someone wrote "sapphic" instead of "lesbian," this guide is for you. Each word has its own history and its own feel. None of them is the "correct" one.

It all starts with one island and one poet

Two of these words trace back to the same place: Lesbos, a Greek island in the Aegean Sea. Around 600 BCE it was home to Sappho, a lyric poet famous in the ancient world for her poems about love and longing, many of them addressed to women.

Most of her work has been lost. What survives is mostly fragments, some only a few words long. Even so, Sappho became a symbol of love between women, and her name and her island ended up in our vocabulary.

Lesbian

Lesbian is the most specific word on this list. It usually means a woman whose romantic and sexual attraction is to women, and not to men. Many nonbinary people also use it because it describes their attraction and community.

Lesbian carries a lot of history: political movements, bar culture, butch and femme identities, and decades of activism. Some women love it for exactly that weight. Others grew up hearing it used as an insult and prefer a softer word, at least at first.

Sapphic

Sapphic describes any woman or nonbinary person who is attracted to women, whatever else they might be attracted to. That includes lesbians, bi women, pan women and many queer women.

People pick sapphic for a few reasons. It is inclusive, so a lesbian and a bi woman can both use it. It sounds a little romantic and literary. It is also handy for describing media: "sapphic books" or "sapphic films" covers any story about women loving women, whatever the characters call themselves.

WLW (women who love women)

WLW stands for "women who love women." It is internet-era shorthand that spread on social media, where short tags matter. Like sapphic, it includes lesbians, bi women and anyone else who loves women.

WLW is practical and neutral. You will see it in hashtags, fan communities and dating profiles. Some nonbinary people find it does not quite fit them because of the word "women," so they may prefer sapphic or queer instead.

Queer

Queer is the broadest word here. It can describe anyone who is not straight or not cisgender. For a long time it was used as a slur, and activists began reclaiming it in the late 1980s and 1990s.

Today many younger people use queer as an open, flexible identity. It is great if you do not want to be specific, if your attraction does not fit a neat box, or if your gender is part of the picture. Some older people still find the word painful, so it is worth being thoughtful about using it for someone else.

Bi (and pan)

Bisexual usually means attraction to more than one gender. It does not have to mean 50/50, and it does not mean only men and women. Pansexual is similar and often emphasizes attraction regardless of gender.

Bi women are sapphic, they are WLW, and many are queer. They are welcome in sapphic spaces, including this one. A bi woman dating a woman is still bi, and a bi woman dating a man is still bi.

Quick comparison

• Lesbian: attracted to women, not men. Specific, historic, political for some.
• Sapphic: attracted to women, may also be attracted to others. Inclusive and a bit poetic.
• WLW: same scope as sapphic, more casual and internet-native.
• Queer: anyone outside straight or cisgender norms. Broad and flexible.
• Bi or pan: attracted to more than one gender. A full identity, not a phase.

You will also run into a few other words. Gay is used by plenty of women, especially in casual speech ("I'm gay" is short, clear and works everywhere). Dyke was long used as an insult, and many lesbians have reclaimed it with pride, as in the Dyke Marches held in many cities. Like queer, it is best used by people who claim it for themselves.

How to choose a word for yourself

You can use one, several, or none. Plenty of women say "I'm a lesbian" at work, "I'm queer" with friends and "sapphic" in their bio. That is not inconsistency. It is choosing the right word for the room.

A few questions can help. Does your attraction include men, or not? Do you want a word that feels specific or one that leaves room? Does the history of a word make you feel proud, or does it feel heavy right now? Your answers might point to different words at different times, and that is fine.

Labels also shift with age, place and community. A word that feels awkward at 17 might feel like a crown at 27. Try one on, say it out loud, and notice how it sits.

If you are still figuring out where you fit, our guide on how to know if you're a lesbian has questions to reflect on, and the glossary explains many more terms.