Lesbian type
Lipstick
Full glam, high polish, and gay on purpose
What is a lipstick lesbian?
A lipstick lesbian is a lesbian or sapphic person with a very feminine, glamorous and polished style. She often loves makeup, styled hair and fashion, and treats getting ready as a creative ritual. Lipstick is usually seen as one flavor of femme, turned all the way up.
Signature traits
The lipstick look
- Full makeup, bold or flawless
- Styled hair and a great manicure
- Dresses, heels and statement bags
- Trend aware outfits
- Signature lipstick shade
- Jewelry that ties it together
Lipstick in love
A lipstick lesbian tends to love romance with a bit of sparkle: dressing up for dinner, getting photos together and celebrating anniversaries properly. She is often socially confident and fun to bring to a party. Many lipsticks put real thought into how they show up for a partner, from the perfect gift to a carefully planned date. She also wants a partner who sees past the glam to the very real, sometimes very goofy person underneath. Compliment the lipstick, then listen to her.
Where the word comes from
The phrase lipstick lesbian became widely known in the US in the 1980s and 1990s, as media started noticing glamorous, feminine lesbians who did not fit the old stereotypes. At times the media attention was a little shallow, treating lipstick lesbians as a trend. But for many women, the label was a way to say that you can love makeup and fashion and still be completely gay. Today it is used both proudly and playfully, often alongside femme.
Myths about lipstick lesbians
The loudest myth is that lipstick lesbians are 'just going through a phase' or performing for men. Glam has nothing to do with who you are attracted to. Another myth is that lipsticks are shallow. Loving fashion and beauty is a creative interest, and many lipsticks are also deeply thoughtful, ambitious and kind. People also assume lipsticks only date other lipsticks. In reality, they date across the whole spectrum, and some of the cutest couples are a lipstick and a butch.
Signs you might be a lipstick lesbian
- You have a lipstick shade for every mood and a backup in every bag.
- Getting ready with music on is one of your favorite parts of the night.
- Friends text you photos of outfits for approval.
- You are tired of hearing 'but you're so pretty' after you come out.
- Glam feels like art to you, and you are the canvas.
Lipstick vs femme
All lipsticks are pretty much femmes, but not all femmes are lipsticks. Femme covers the whole range of feminine queer expression. Lipstick is the high polish end, with more makeup, more styling and a bigger love of glam.
Lipstick vs hard femme
Both can be glamorous. A lipstick lesbian's glam is often polished and classic. A hard femme's glam comes with edge: dark lipstick, sharp eyeliner, leather and a don't mess with me attitude. Many people mix the two.
Lipstick style ideas
- A red lip, a black dress and gold hoops for instant classic glam.
- A pastel suit with a satin camisole for a sapphic twist.
- Glossy nails in a seasonal color.
- A small pin or charm in sunset flag colors as a quiet signal.
Lipstick lesbian dating tips
- Plan a date worth dressing up for, then tell her it is worth dressing up for.
- Compliment specific choices, like the shade or the earrings. She chose them on purpose.
- Do not say she 'doesn't look gay'. She has heard it, and it is not the compliment people think.
- Be ready for photos. Many lipsticks love documenting a great night.
Under the glam, most lipsticks want what everyone wants: to be seen clearly and loved for the whole person, not just the look.
Who lipsticks often click with
Are you a lipstick?
30 statements, about 3 minutes. See how much lipstick you really are, and what else is in the mix.
Take the free testLipstick FAQ
What does lipstick lesbian mean?
A lipstick lesbian is a lesbian or sapphic person with a very feminine, glamorous style, often including makeup, styled hair and fashion. It is generally seen as a glam subtype of femme. The term became well known in the 1980s and 1990s and is now used proudly and playfully.
Is lipstick lesbian offensive?
It is usually not offensive, and many women use it about themselves with pride. It can feel reductive if someone uses it to suggest a woman is not really gay or is only performing. As with most labels, it is best to use it for people who claim it.
What is the difference between lipstick and chapstick lesbians?
Lipstick lesbians love glam and polish: makeup, styled hair and fashion. Chapstick lesbians prefer a sporty, natural, low maintenance look, with lip balm instead of lipstick. Both can be feminine. The difference is mostly about how much glam someone enjoys.